Week 5!

BUSY WEEKEND AND BABIES!
We had a great weekend. Saturday was busy as usual. We got up early to go to Delaney's soccer game. On the way into town, my cellphone recieved a text message. I noticed it was a "419" number, but not one I recognized. I clicked on and up popped the picture of a beautiful baby girl. I knew it had to be my cousin, Julie's baby. They named her Lucy and just talking to her brother, TD, and sister, Sarah, reminded me how I felt each time I had one of mine. It is truly the best day of your life! They sounded so excited. I can't wait to see her in real life!
We had to change clothes, then, and go to Drew's first flag football game. He loved it! Dawsyn and Delaney are cheering for his team and they did a good job, even though it was cold and a long afternoon. Drew says he likes flag football because it is more about the plays then tackling! He actually was put in as "quarterback" a lot because he would actually try to set up a play instead of just take the ball and run with it. That's Drew--always thinking! Today is our first day of Spring Break and we have Caroline for the day. It is good practice for the kids. I notice that because they know a new baby is coming, they are more attentive to her and wanting to be very helpful--especially the girls. Although, Dax is doing his part as well. Caroline was sitting on the floor crying at one point and Dax thought he would make her feel better, so he did the obvious--he went and sat on her lap! Needless to say, she DID NOT feel better by this kind gesture! One of my favorite things about kids are the way they think. It really is amazing.

GOOD NEWS
So, I woke up early to go to the hospital and get my blood drawn. I know they say that in early pregnancy you HcG level is supposed to double every 48-72 hours. Because they only saw a sac on Tuesday, they wanted to see if my levels were going up at a rate they should be, or, worse, going down. On Tuesday, my level was 4559. This morning, about 60 hours later, my level was 13,138. That almost tripled! I am thinking that is a good indication, that so far everything is alright. There is still the chance of a blighted ovum, but it should rule out ectopic from everything I have read. I am waiting to see what the doctor wants to do next. I am hoping it will be an u/s around week 7 or 8 so we can see a heartbeat! I think that will make me feel a lot better. Thank you to everyone for their prayers. On a side note, once-in-awhile, I am reminded that I still exist as a person, as an individual, as someone who has a name other than mom. Today is the last day of school before Spring Break (much needed by my entire family!) and I also found out that I got recommended for a continuing contract in my school district. Basically, that means that I have a contract here for as long as I want it and it moves me way up on the seniority list!

UNSURE!
Unfortunately, on Tuesday, I experienced a little bleeding and some lower back pain. Because this is my fifth and I've had 4 precious c-sections, the doctor wanted me to go to the ER. What a miserable experience that turned into. They started an IV, pumped me full of fluids and then sent me for an ultrasound. The ultrasound just showed an empty sac. They said that I could have miscarried and my body absobed everything already, or that I am earlier than I thought and they just can't see the baby yet. I am pretty sure of my dates, so I am feeling that this might be a blighted ovum. They sent me home with the label of "threatened miscarriage" and I go back tomorrow morning for bloodwork to see if my levels are rising or dropping. Two days later, I have had no further bleeding and I still have all of my symptoms, but I am afraid to get my hopes up! I walk around feeling like a ticking time bomb, just waiting to start bleeding horribly! Tomorrow morning can't come fast enough! I go back and forth between times of optimism and hope and then there are moments when I am sure the pregnancy is over. I truly feel for those women who struggle with fertility issues and go through this all the time. I can't imagine. The hardest part is the kids. They know something is up, but they don't know what. Every day they ask if they can tell one more person about the baby (I let them each tell one friend). At the same time, the best part is the kids. They keep my mind off things. For instance, April Fool's Day was great. I had taken wafer cookies, covered them in peanut butter, and rolled them in crushed cereal. They looked just like fish sticks! Then I took green taffy, rolled it into small balls, creating "peas". So, when the kids came down for breakfast, we had "fishsticks and peas". They were not happy to say the least, and were very excited to discover that it was cookies and candy! :) I also had printed off a fake summer camp brochure called, "CAMP CHORE". It described how the kids would learn to make beds, mow the lawn, do the dishes and laundry. I then informed the older three that I had already signed them up for it. Drew was SOOO mad. He said, "Gee, thanks mom--that sounds soo fun!" I mean, who wouldn't want to have a dozen more kids, when we have fun like this??? Please pray for good news tomorrow!


TELLING
Week 5 seems like the perfect time to tell everyone #5 is coming. Not that it is my choice in any way, because my belly is already sticking way out there! :) It's like the muscles start to get those hormones and say, "Hey--I know what this is all about!". I'm glad my muscles have memory, because mine is already starting to falter!

I started by telling my Mom. Partly because I had to go for bloodwork and I didn't want it coming across her fax machine at work and he finding out there, or worse, someone she work with finding out first, but mainly because she's my mom. Somehow if she knows about something and says it's OK --then it really is OK. She knew I had to go for repeat bloodwork because I had "Fifth's Disease"--a really strange virus, a few weeks before I got pregnant. So, got on one of those WebMD sites and printed off the side-effects of FIfth's Disease, only I added a line about it being rare, but sometimes causing the birth of fifth child in adults! LOL! It took her a minute. She read it and said, "Oh--that's odd", then it dawned on her.

Well, since Mom knows, her joy is so evident, she has to share it with others. We decided we needed to tell the kids. I bought a huge plastic egg and filled it with skittles, under the candy there was a bib that said, "Ilove my brother and sister", then there was a note that said, "Guess who's coming to Thanksgiving dinner?". I think Drew understood right away, but the rest didn't get it. Finally, Delaney said, "Mommy's going to have a brother and sister!" Drew sat on the couch, leaned back and said, "I'm in over my head"! Dawsyn ran from the room screaming and Dax came and pulled up my shirt "looking" for this baby! It was great.

After the initial shock wore off, which at this age was like 5 minutes, the kids got down to the more important business of eating their skittles. They did this in the usual fashion-Drew sorting his into color piles before eating them, Dawsyn giving each one some sort of "Fairy" name and then hiding them somewhere for later, Delaney quickly eating hers and hoping she can talk Dawsyn in to letting her have her leftovers, and Dax tossing his on the living room floor and then doing his best rendition of a vacuum cleaner! As this was going on, Drew, who had been extremely quiet, finally looks at Shawn and says, "Alright, I guess this is fine, but this absolutely has to be the last one, I mean, really Mom, it's getting embarrassing!" Ah, memories...and to think, he doesn't even know how the baby came to be. I can't imagine how embarrassed he will be then!

Last day of first month

So, today is the last day of week 4. I know people are going to tell me I am crazy to have a FIFTH! Want to know what's even crazier??? I am actually a little sad that I am through the first month of what is certainly going to have to be my last pregnancy (If all goes well). I'm sure my husband will not understand this, but it is just who I am.
A few weeks ago, Shawn found our playbill from the the play we were in our senior year. The Play that is responisble for our relationship, and consequently, Drew, Dawsyn, Delaney, Dax and TB. In it, everyone put what their future plans were, out of 30-some kids, I was the only one who mentioned wanting to have a family! Hello! Shawn can't say he didn't know I wanted a lot of kids.
I tried to tell him that it was all his fault because he once said, "Give me 5!" I can't help it that I took him literally???? :) I also tried to tell him that this could be a possible side-effect of the Fifth's Disease the kids and I had a few months ago--he didn't think this was funny either, sometimes I don't think he gets my humor!
I can tell he is happy, though. He gets that twinkle in his eye when he looks at me and he brushes his hand across my belly already. Today, I actually feel a little better than yesterday--just got really nauseous driving the kids to the sitter's this morning and right before lunch the lovely smells of the school cafeteria wafted up to my room and it was less than pleasant! I have had a lot of pulling in my ovaries today and not much cramping. My chest is giving Dolly Parton a run for her money, but my head cold seems to be subsiding.
The family might find out tonight--we'll see how it goes!

From the beginning...

...OK--I won't start at the very beginning because that's just a little too much information! Let's just say that working full time and having four kids doesn't leave a lot of time for my husband and I to be alone. So... when we do finally get the chance to "be alone" it isn't hard to figure out when things happened.
That being said, I am pretty sure when "TB" (I've decided to call the baby TB for tie-breaker since we already have two boys and two girls) came into existence, so for those who are interested here are the dates and how it unfolded:

March 6/7: TB "became"

March 13: I started feeling tired. I literally fell asleep on the couch when my oldest son, Drew had friends over--it was embarrasing!

March 14: Noticed that my chest was a little sore and felt "tingling"

March 16th: Really started feeling like there was something going on! I felt the slight cramping in the area of my ovaries and the achy, tingling in my chest. I also felt VERY TIRED.

March 17th-St. Patrick's Day! Since I was due to start the next day, I took a pregnancy test. It came back negative.

March 18th-I start waking up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and I think to myself--oh come on! I only EVER do that when I am pregnant!

March 19th-same symptoms, another negative test

March 20th- same symptoms, another negative.

March 21st-Today, I got really dizzy when I was playing with the kids. We were at Gameworks and Dax and I were "driving" in Mario Cart and I felt like I was going to pass out! A little while later, I notice I had just a small amount of spotting. Once again, I thought, "I've been through this before!"

March 22nd-Sunday Morning--I wake up to get ready for church and take a cheap $-store test. It was negative. When I get out of the shower, I notice there is the smallest, slightest shadow of a line. I assume it is just because it is a dollar-store test and I looked at it after the recommended 10 minutes.
After church my husband decides to get a digital test. This came back "NO!" On Sunday evening, I couldn't resist and I took another stick test, this time same thing--after 10 minutes the smallest shade of a line appeared. This got me hopeful since it was a name-brand test.

March 23rd--I get up early to get ready for school and decide to try both a regular and a digital test. I wanted to get that first morning urine (TMI), so I did both tests at once--I mean by the fifth pregnancy, I must have a talent somewhere, right? Immediately I see a second pink line, and about a minute later, the digital pops up with "YES!". My husband's response was to roll over and say, "I knew it". Granted it was 5 in the morning and his only day to sleep in, but I was honestly hoping for a little more enthusiasm!

So, that leads us to today--in that limbo of : will I carry to full term? Who do I tell? When do I tell? Lots of questions!

This should be old hat!

...and in some ways, I guess it is. Now that we got that second blue line, that plus sign, the yes! on the digital, and the "pregnant" on the clear blue easy, not to mention the five dollar-store tests I took first, it is starting to sink in.

Now I'm in that Limbo/paranoia stage. I walk through the hallways of my school thinking "he knows" or "she knows". Of course, I feel like my belly enters a room five minutes before I do, when actually it just looks like I ate a big meal. I will say with this being number 5, I do feel like I knew right from the beginning and like I am already showing. I also feel like I feel EVERYTHING so much more--probably because I know what to expect this time. Still, I catch myself having those moments of "am I really?--because for the last five minutes, I've felt pretty good" or checking the toilet paper every time I go to the bathroom.

So, here is to another 9 months of craziness, sickness, soreness, and all of the other stuff that goes with it--and I am so blessed and thankful for it all. Now, we just need a nickname for our little one--#1 was "Boo", #2 was "two", #3 was "bean", and #4 was "little man", Since this is most definitely our last one, we'll need to be creative!